Example six

Meg was 7. Dyadic sessions began with just Meg and her mum, and the joint sessions were alternated with adult sessions involving the therapists and both parents.

In total Meg had four sessions with her mum followed by four sessions with her dad, and then two sessions with them both together.

During the joint session the therapist asked the parents to adopt a non-directive “sit on your hands approach”. Meg’s mum found this quite easy although she seemed anxious about boundaries, particularly in relation to mess and using up materials.

Meg’s dad found the non-directive approach harder than her mum did and sometimes slipped, despite himself, into a teaching role, trying to direct Meg into purposeful activity. However both were able to notice what they struggled with and think about why in very useful ways.

Images

Sloppy messy images and activities characterised the sessions with Mum. Mum’s discomfort with boundary setting came up in discussions.

When dad started coming with Meg there was a sudden change in the materials Meg chose. She wanted to build a castle, and the idea appealed to her dad who jumped at the task. When Meg’s attention started to wander, Dad kept reminding her of the task and in the end just got on with building it himself. In the subsequent parent session Dad was amused to realise how far he had strayed from the instruction to follow the Meg’s lead.

In another session, Meg wanted just to cut up pieces of paper into smaller and smaller fragments. Again reflective discussions were possible to help Dad think about his reaction to this. There was something about acknowledging the destructive impulses as well as the constructive ones.

Dad really enjoyed his sessions with Meg, and his skills at following her lead developed quickly. As the sessions drew to an end the parents expressed a desire to carry on these special art making times at home. In parent meetings we discussed how they could structure this.